India and the word 'Intolerance'

Bit late here, but last two days, all my timeline, twitter feeds, news channels are filled with hashtag AamirKhan and in association with the word 'intolerance', which by now has become national word and depending on the way it is used by you, determines your patriotism.

I think its really stupid for a celebrity of his caliber to say such thing in public. i mean dont you know that ours is country where a world famous tennis star can be burnt all over (not literally of course) because she does not know our self defined cricket God. By the way, just to clear, Intolerance means 'असहिष्णुता' in simple words 'असहनशीलता' . Now that you know the meaning, Dare you call us intolerant, we will not tolerate it at all.

In a way, Aamir Khan is stupid. I mean who in his sane mind speaks his mind? I cant even tell my boss that he sucks big time and you, sir, told in public that your wife feels there is rising sense of insecurity. Who does that? Ask any married man, if you want peace, never ever share what your wife told you at home, it surely can turnout to be a disaster, well you already know that now. I am sure, by now, Kiran must have taken an U-turn and bashed you by saying that she never said that. Whats the outcome? washerman's dog must be proud of getting compared to a superstar.

Always make a point to say something nice. Nobody wants to hear what you want to say, people want to hear what they want to listen. Take away? Say something like 'Mera Bharat Mahaan', 'East or west India is the best', or say something like, 'we are soon to become a world leader' or to get more cheers, say 'i can see rupee value going to equal to dollar very soon'. See how people react, you might as well get a temple built on your name.

See no one cares that you have adopted village in Bhuj and worked to their welfare. Its not what you do, its what you say. This is no a dark knight movie my friend. Movie reminds me that your new movie Dangal is soon going to release, i sincerely hope that this is not a promotional strategy, because if it is, hats off to you, you are a true marketing professional. because thats what a marketing guy does, uses people's stupidity for their own benefit, you did exactly the same.

Now that our beloved patriotic party Shiv Sena, has announced reward for those who slap you, please stick some god and goddess stickers on your face and see if it works. No, no one will say that this move from shiv sena is intolerant. They never said they are leaving India or Maharashtra, they believe beating others out, patriotism you see, so much that they can make you tie a mangalsutra to a girl, with whom you went to watch a movie.

No, we are not intolerant, infact we are too tolerant, we tolerate a bunch of goons on the street passing comments on girls, we tolerate all those stupid boycotts, we tolerate people appeasement of those who left the country long back and now shout 'bharat mata ki jay' in meddison square. We tolerate all kind of bans, fatwas and market bands. We tolerate 'Go to Pakistan'. We tolerate all those incidents of farmer suicides and keep a count so that it can be shown using pivot tables, how the numbers over the years have increased. What if we are busy running 24 by 7 news and discussion on what a movie actor felt and said.

We are still tolerant. Cheers to Incredible India !! 

Lets play antakshari !!

I looked at him and he looked at me then we both looked at the driver, he looked at the girl. girl looked at us with 'never gonna sit with these baboons' look. 'there is no space' sentences like this do not exists in sharing auto culture. Hinjewadi chowk, Pune. Kurla signal, Mumbai. St. Johns busstop, Bangalore. and today at Charbaug, Lucknow. Different lifestyle, same auto culture, we live by phrases like 'Unity in diversity'. Also we all equally agree that Modiji is going to bring black money back and will deposit 15 hundred thousand to each of our bank accounts.

Bank accounts, can be open now with zero initial balance, thanks to Indian government. Farmers can deposit their money if any, after they have finished their dinner, which by the way is the only time they eat. Also you can show those pass books and cheque books to the schools where they will give free admissions to your daughters. 'Girl must be educated' so that at least she can calculate how many girls are raped, how many girls are killed of dowry, how many girls are aborted and how many girls have thought their own girls has to be educated.

No, the girl said 'pass' to the auto driver and we both got little air between our legs. Hunman ji hanging from the windshield smiled. Hanuman ji also had smiled when he found lost Sita ji and smiled more in the same episode he burnt the city of Lanka. 'Okay, not in same episode' Ramanand Sagar took at least three, it was just a phrase to denote same incident of Ashok Vatika in Ramanaya. I can imagine what lankan's would have felt. more or less like they felt yesterday.

Sangakara, and Jayavardhane retiring, team out of the world cup, pretty much same like one more down for Lankans. It was a good game. South African's are really showing signs of removing their 'chokers' tag. Today is India vs Bangladesh, I always wondered why in 1971 war, we didnt capture the territory altogether? Today i feel other way round, in a knockout round you need a match against team like bangladesh to win. Thank God they are a different country though some of them might also have Indian 'Rashan card' or 'Aadhar card'. That's a different game altogether.

Our government has relaxed the norms of aadhar card for LPG connections. That's a big relief for people who have false gas connections, i mean getting multiple gas connections are far more easier than getting multiple retina scans. I read somewhere that scanning retina might hinder your vision, but who cares of vision now a days.

Even Arvind Kejriwal had a vision of clean and corruption free politics. I am sure in recent times he went through multiple retina scans. Vision has blurred and politics has flourished anyway. Now the news says he has asked to remove all the ACs from his apartment. AC can be pretty bad for your health if you have severe cough. If you have a AC at home, behave like a common man and keep it switched off, removing them might make you look fool or Arvind Kejriwal himself deside which is worst.

Talking about worst things, have you seen the cost of daily goods now a days? Well I am sure you all buy sugar, milk, pulses and vegetables, cloths and will surely know apart from cellphone all costs are going up up and up.

'UP' must watch movie, you will love it more if your wife is dead and she left a picture of an exotic location.

My location for now is Amausi Chaudhary charan singh International Airport. ten rupees to sharing auto and ten thousand rupees to sharing Indigo flight.

Sharing always makes you feel good. Keep sharing with me. No I have to catch a flight, 'Antakshrai' some other time.    

Our wrong understanding of rituals.

Next day of my marriage was surprisingly calm. the hectic and over the top marriages tend to drain you like a last drop of lemon. after a week of extremely stressing environment, suddenly all seemed peaceful. a bright sunny day in month of February is always a bliss in Northern part of India.

It was all true till i climbed down the stairs. There was no sign that marriage functions were over. all seemed busy. but busy doing what? i held my cousin. 'whats going on?' 'they are all coming to see the bride, what you call it? yeah right 'mu dikhayi'

The hell, one more unwanted event. haven't they all seen her on the reception stage or in the marriage? but that's how it was. i was relaxed as none of them wanted to see the groom, so i was off the hook. but i thought of her, poor girl, its like a never ending nightmare, suddenly leave home, leave parents, come to a completely stranger family, where you have no idea of what to do and what not and on top of it face all these unknown faces of gossip makers, commenting and judging her, a nightmare it is.

'How long this will go?' and answer was 'till the time people keep coming' Gosh. i wanted to peek in the hall room where all this drama was happening. And i did. Believe me it made me furious. there were four ladies, i didn't know single of them, and buaji, elder sister of my father, who was acting in charge of this drama, all sitting on sofa and there was she, not looking up at all, sitting on ground, on an old mat.

I was dumbstruck. This is how we were treating her? at least five more person could sit on those sofas, but she was made to sit on ground, in front of those bunch of neighbors, whom i don't even know of.

'what the hell is going on?' i almost shouted in front of my Mom, who was busy preparing snacks for those godlike aunties enjoying there divinity. she was the one who has said that we will treat her like our own daughter. she had no idea what i was talking about. 'why is she sitting on ground?' 'why are we behaving like a illiterate, uneducated culture less morons?' she understood now, and yes it was a big deal.

She went to the hall room running and came back. 'I cant say anything to your buaji' she said worried 'and also this is how it has been, bride has to sit on the ground. If i say anything it will be like insulting her, she is eldest.' she kept explaining me that she is helpless. but then she said something different altogether. 'i want you to go there and make her sit on sofa'

Now it was my turn to rush. i walked out there, pulled a single sofa near her. she was still not looking up. 'come sit here' i said. all eyes were on me. she looked up to me, i don't know if it was expression of doing something wrong or doing something right, but it was flavored with elements of surprise. but she didnt get up. she knew it was against our so called culture. but i was adamant. 'you don't have to sit on ground, now please come and sit here'

I walked out of the room leaving a pin drop silence and gazing eyes of my buaji. and also her, who was still watching me with her teary eyes. My Mom was waiting just near the door. 'yes, she is sitting on sofa now' and she smiled.

This is just an incident. In our culture there are lot many rules and rituals which symbolically deteriorate a person from being equal. we don't even notice them and follow with our eyes closed. Even girls who are going through all this, accept it saying 'this is how it is'. we talk about being well cultured, we boast how rich we as an Indian are in our values. but we all are blind and suffering from wrong understanding of rituals. Just because elders are saying, that doesn't make it right. One has to use their own conscious to make right or wrong out of it.

A small act towards equality is just a first step towards the fight against discrimination.

The Good Boy Theory !!

Its a philosophical syndrome of a particular behavior. 'The good boy theory'. Image construction is not intentional but over the period of time, it develops, and like an old banyan tree deep roots in the life itself. we go by the books, believes and cultural sightings, which impacts the decision of one to determine or to differentiate 'the good' and 'the bad'.

Ideology, might be the word to describe it more precisely. But the idea of Ideal behavior is vaguely defined or not defined at all. So there are once who are not good boys and then there are others who took their moral science lessons way to seriously. And this seriousness of being moral, leads to the good boy theory.

Everyone likes him, believe me, everyone of them. parents love him cause he is the most obedient, teachers love him cause he does each and everything he is told to do. friends love him cause whatever they ask for, they get, girls love him, cause he listens to their weirdest and dumbest talk, with patient. Of course he is the good boy, bound to be loved.

But then, its not the complete truth. There is one person who does not like him, its his own himself, only person obliged to hate him because he is the only one who is denied. denied everything. denied to express his own will, his own desire, his own wishes. All this, the cost of being a good boy.

Basically, this image is outcome of greed, selfishness and authority, not his own but of the people who are around him. each one likes to be heard, to be obliged, to be respected, to be pleased, all of them have their own way of satisfying themselves. Is it possible without the help of someone else? we are not Buddha, we are human, we need some catalyst, the good boy works perfectly for all of them.

Testing this is way to simple. If you are a good boy to someone, just do something which is against their will. Theory fails drastically. Just tell your relative, you dont have money to help them. Just tell your girlfriend that you want to spend some time alone and you would not be able to come for movie. try telling your parents i wont send money this month as i have to buy a new laptop. Ask your married girlfriend, did she ever loved you. Ask a friend if he would return the money he borrowed last year.

You see, sooner you do something against their will, be it simplest things ever but just opposing their thoughts, you lose your 'good boy' image. Isnt it surprising, your image is nothing but a reflection of others comfort. The theory looks excellent in books. none is a loser but you. You keep suppressing yourself just to make others comfortable, fueling their greed for more comfort, its never ending.

There is other lot of not so good boys, they share the least expectations from others, and are called names, but the one thing which matters most, they got that, 'they dont hate themselves' and in the end this is what matters. i wonder how many of us are stuck in the 'good boy' image, and wondering in pages of 'The good boy theory'

Artificial world we live !!

Look at the projection all around, you would know that its a 'show world'. from a small child to an adult, we all are busy making ourselves presentable, making others believe how good we are, how good we look, how good we are doing, how good our life is, all presentations. We all have created a parallel world for ourselves and in that world everything seems to be so good, of course this world does not totally overlap with the real world, so every now and then we realize that our life just sucks.

For instance, look at the world's largest community, Facebook or Twitter for that matter
, How beautiful the world seems, everyone over there happy, enjoying their lives to the fullest, everyday i open it and my timeline shows, couples romancing, families holidaying, people getting new jobs, they are getting engaged, watching movies, eating in restaurants, cooking for their wives or husbands, hundreds and hundreds of birthday wishes, millions of comments and billions of likes, marriage pictures, newborn babies, and even honeymoon pictures, i mean literally you can find them kissing, hugging and romancing. then there are mother's day, father's day wishes, they forget to wish their mom, but never to the other citizens of this artificial country. what a beautiful world it is.

Effect: Drastic, first thought, apart from me, everyone is happy. now everyone wants to do the same to be happy, its a fashion trend. if you dont do the same, your are ancient. unfortunately in reality, you have a job, a boss, who gives you orders, you dont have leaves, your have bills to pay, there are EMIs, home loans, rent, daily traffic, no pay hike, increased prices everywhere, in all real life sucks, but its only yours, others are happy, wont beleive me? go and checkout Facebook..

Other and bigger artificial world is Television. I mean seriously, major part of the television is fake. First of all there is nothing called as 'reality show' and News channels are no different, but still we tend to believe it like its happening in our own life. serials and soaps are like killing our family mindsets. one person marrying thrice or more, every family has someone whose whole and sole purpose is to harm others, young people are in this world only to fell in love and then its cool to fight the world for their true and eternal love. Parents have only one task to oppose, well at least one of them if not both.

Effect: Joint families are old fashioned, fathers of daughters, search only for those guys who live away from family, or is single son. making girlfriend/boyfriend is must, always ready to fight opposing parents, tragedy is new cool you see. most importantly in a joint families people are loosing trust on each other. Its all expectations which are soaring high, and when they do not fill, which mostly don't, one feels like he has compromised in life and living a burden.

Then there comes a major stakeholder, commercials. think exactly what you see in any commercial? word is perfection, which does not exist in real. perfect girls everywhere, perfect hair, perfect eyes, perfect figure, perfect voice, perfect dress, perfect makeup, everything about the girls in a commercial is perfect. Male gender, stud, height-weight equation in equilibrium, not a single hint of fat, dream boy of every women. why? only because product must be sold.

Effect: we all want to be the same. girls want to look the same, boys want to be the same, and believe me nobody is able to achieve it, not even the people who are already their in those advertisements. the people whom we see in those ads are result of heavy makeup, high lenses cameras and most importantly, editing, mixing and photoshop. everything is made perfectly according to the script, yes its a script not the real world.

Problem is all these things have become an integral part of our life, so much that our happiness, sadness, jealousy, love, likes, care and all other emotions have become slave of these artificial world. this is making us more unhappy, looking normal is no reason to be sad, but we become sad, because we fail to look good. we become sad that others are holidaying and we are not, others traveling to different countries, we are not. others are falling in love, we are not. others eating in particular restaurant, people are watching movies, buying cars, buying houses, apartments, dogs, cats, buffaloes and what not. I am bald, i am not fair, i am not having a good looking wife, my husband is fat, all these criteria, what do you think has come from?

Only answer i can think of is the artificial world we live in !!  

she said I love you isn’t she?

I jumped from the ship into the knee high shore water, black pearl it was, ordered my crew to lower the sail and shouted, ‘this is your captain jack sparrow and you know what to do next, take whatever you can and give back nothing’.  

‘Captain, captain’ somebody shouted pulling me back by my shoulder. ‘No body, I said no body touches my shoulder’ I opened my eyes, ‘dude, your phone is ringing’.

Damn this ringtone, every time it rings while I sleep, makes me think of myself as Jack Sparrow. Sleep and phone call is really a depressing combination and I love being depressive, sometimes of course, So instead of putting it on silent, I picked up the call.

‘Holy shit, you picked up the call’ the lady shouted from the other side. Without even saying a word I disconnected the call. International calls can really rip off your pockets. I realized I should have cut the call and would have dialed back to her. After all I am using a cheap India calling card, but then who thinks this much while sleeping. I sat there for few more minutes and then dialed to calling card number, ‘Please enter the phone number you wish to dial, followed by the pound key’ a recorded message of a lady with an extremely lovable voice, played’ I typed her number. Yes, I remember the number, thanks to this stupid calling card.

‘I am sorry’ was the opening words of the day. ‘Hello’ is outdated. ‘I was in sleep’ I added to justify my mistake.

‘Its 11:17 in morning here, that makes 11:47 night over there, I can’t believe you were sleeping’  

What the…

‘Anyway, my mood is really off and I am not feeling like talking to anyone’

Okays that means I do not belong to the group of ‘anyone’ and talking to me will make her off mood go jolly, wow, this is not jack sparrow story, this is story of Will turner and Elizabeth Swann, though I am not a sword maker and she does not look that pretty and also does not wear such tight cloths and also she doesn’t know to swim and also…never mind.

‘What’s the matter?’ I asked playing almost all the scenes from the movie were William and Elizabeth were involved.

‘I need to book a tatkal ticket and no one over here was able to book it today, which leaves me only with one day and that is tomorrow.’ She said.

Truly speaking, my brain stopped receiving those noise wave signals as soon as it decoded the words ‘Tatkal Ticket’. A blue white screen started revolving around my eyes with hour glass rotating in a vacuum where no external force was working on it. She would have asked for my neighbor’s eye or a vada pav here in Chicago or an American girl named Saraswati or a blue colored tomato or a red color American cow or whatever but ‘Tatkal Ticket’? I mean oh lord Jesus what kind of test is this? I know you test our love but seriously dude ‘Tatkal Ticket’?

‘Hello, your there?’

Yes where the hell would I go? I am here, listening to your funny way of telling me, I am no good for you. 

Yes, I am here.

‘Can you try from there?’

Of course, why not after all ‘Karmanye Vadhikaraste, Ma phaleshou kada chana’.  I will try, although I know booking a tatkal ticket is like running behind a chicken to catch an ostrich but then ‘Girte hain shesawar hi maidane jang me, wo tifl kya girenge jo ghutno ke bal chale’

‘Yes’ after motivating myself from ‘Shrimad Bhagvat Geeta’ and a few lines from Azeem Dehalvi, Here I was loud and clear.

‘Thank you thank you thank you’ she was like Kareena Kapoor of Jab we met. ‘I will send you the details. You know na when you have to login? Nevermind I will send you all the details in mail’

‘ok’

‘So how are you? And how is weather over there? I heard something like polar vertex. Is everything ok? Of course it will be, after all you love winter’

How sweet. Do I need to say something or you will add more? Ha, typical, sometimes I think I am a victim of dual personality disorder. A part of me says, ‘how sweet’ and the other part just says ‘ha’, I need to find myself, well…ha!

Next day I received the mail. Two tickets? Holy mother of cow. Who is the guy? I checked the time 5 minutes to 10:30 PM my time. So there was no time to shake the tree of loyalty. ‘Bajarang bali it’s a test for my love, please help me’ and I clicked on login. Click click and click. Online banking User id and password. Click click and few more clicks. ‘Do you want a printout’ a window popped up. I read it twice. I could not believe my eyes, my brain was trying to decode it several times to make sure what it was receiving was authentic. ‘yes it was’ ‘Bajaran bali did it’ ‘holy Indian cow dung, I did it’ 'I did it'. I saved the ticket as PDF file and replied back to the mail attaching the file. This is called a real attachment. Ishq wala love type asli wala real attachment.

A single word reply came back ‘call’. And I went through the same process of the India calling card.

‘I love you, I knew you would do it. I knew. I told him that you are my bestest best friend. We both desperately wanted to go on this trip. Now it’s happening just because of you, thank you thank you thank you’

‘No problem at all. Have a wonderful trip BOTH OF YOU.’ I said last three words in capitals. Sigh! I told you that sometimes I just love to depress myself.

Well, what if she doesn't love you, at least she said ‘I love you isn’t she? I asked myself. ‘Ha…!’ I replied.

‘Food security Bill’ or ‘Vote security Bill’

Recently this Bill passed in Monsoon session has created a lot of fuss in and out of the parliament. Media has named it Vote Security Bill and the opposition has not really opposed it as they are not the one who is going to risk their own quota of the votes. Ultimately it’s all a part of politics, call it dirty or healthy our leaders or should call them politicians, have sweared on politicizing everything, literally.

Half of the people who are opposing or who are supporting it do not even know what exactly this Bill is about. Their behavior is like a sheep in herd and they just follow the herd. So what is this Bill?

“As per the provisions of the bill, beneficiaries would get rice at 3 rs/kg, wheat at 2 rs/kg, and coarse grains at 1 rs/kg. These rates would be valid for three years. Every pregnant woman and lactating mother would get free meal during pregnancy till six months after child birth. They will also get a maternity benefit of 6,000 rs in installments. Children up to 14 years would get free meals. In case of non-supply of food grains, states will have to pay food security allowance to beneficiaries.”

Now who are these beneficiaries no one knows yet. I heard that Government is starting a survey to identify them. Here one noticeable thing is there are already schemes which are providing really cheap food grains to people who are below Poverty line. There are already mid-day meals for children country wide. And already free check-ups and medicines for pregnant women. So what extra benefit this Bill is going to provide? Now they say, number of beneficiaries will be much higher. Bravo…

‘There is no free lunch’ was a saying till now and I am sure our government is hell bent on proving it wrong. You want to see where is the free lunch? Please come and visit India. India, at one point of time one of the fastest growing economy has imposed a great amount of risk on its already sinking economy, by providing free lunch. Why? What a stupid word is this ‘why?’, of course to lure the people who really vote.

Now question arises how it will be done? I am not really a economist but I know how a simple give and take works. But first we have to identify who is the giver and who is the taker. Giver is for sure the Government treasury, which we all know is filled by the tax payer’s money, I will come to it. Takers are the poor of this country, which happens to be 32.7% of the population i.e. approximately 400 millions of people, but in this case as the beneficiary limit is greater than that as per the Bill, which consists of farmers, daily wage earners and also people who does nothing.

Now the government will buy food grains from farmers, with higher payment (prices are shooting already) and then they will give back the same grains to them with negligible prices, also to them who do nothing or work on daily basis. Think of the effect, why do you think the daily earners will work anymore? They already got what they work for. Why do you think a person who does nothing, will do anything if he gets already what he would earn. Living in this country and doing nothing has become a bliss for them, now they just need to Vote and keep doing nothing.

Who is at loss? Government? Government is just a body who manages the country (ideally) by regulating money, collecting taxes and using that money in infrastructure, defense and welfare of the citizen. So the Money which government has is from salaried employees, businessmen, companies, organizations who are paying taxes. In short its people’s money which Government is using to pay and buy food for poor.

So what’s the outcome? Indirectly half of the working people are spending their hard earn money to feed the other half. On the same lines I read somewhere -

“Just think what will happen when the one half gets the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them and when the other half gets an idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for. Well, it is when it is beginning of the end of an economy.”

 Only motive behind this Bill, according to Government, is to remove poverty which we don’t see is working and looking at the amount of corruption it is less likely that even half of the people who belong to this beneficiary list will even know about it and like other welfare schemes this will also end up filling political pockets. 

 Well, statement still has question marks ‘Food security Bill’ or ‘Vote security Bill’???

Ganpati Bappa Morya !!

Living in Mumbai there are something’s one has to learn. One of them is celebrating Ganesh Chaturthi. I am not saying that we have to learn to celebrate or learn to enjoy the festival which was once a symbol of unity. We have to learn how to tolerate the abuse in the name of almighty lord. The festival which was started in a small temple in Pune by respected Bal Gangadhar Tilak to unite all Indians against colonial rule of England now has turned his face. Good turns to Evil at some point of time and this is turning to be an example of it, good turning evil.

One would be thinking that I am talking about the pollution it causes to the city be it polluting the ocean, polluting the air or crossing the decibel limits with party songs creating an huge amount of noise pollution. These are just the tip of the iceberg. Real evil is the pollution of minds and pollution of behavior to an extent where some of them start treating themselves as the agent of God himself.

If you live in Mumbai, Pune or any city of the Maharashtra, you will know what I am talking about. Collecting money has become a fashion, if not a requirement. Few receipts can make your life miserable if you are fond of bargaining, especially if you are not a Marathi speaking cast. Yes, I would call it a cast, because behavior is similar i.e. hate other casts and they are no different.

One of the incidences will prove what I want to say here. It was Sunday morning and bunch of people rang the door bell asking for some donation for the Ganesh Chaturthi which they were going to setup just outside the colony. ‘But we have already donated to the people who came yesterday’ the guy said from the house.

‘That was for your colony, this is for the area’

At first it was too much for the guy but then if there are bunch of goons standing on your door, who would like to argue. He just went inside, came out and gave them a hundred rupee note.

‘Do we look like a beggar to you? You will spend thousands for your comforts, but when it comes for God you will shy away. You non-Marathi’s come here and then disrespect our God. We won’t take less than five hundred.’

What option is left? Can you take a stand against this? We all know where this money goes; surely not a penny from it is spent for a good cause. The soon you refuse to give those five hundreds. You are the one disrespecting THEIR God, which was supposed to be yours too. You are in front of a gang of goons, shouting, abusing and threatening to you and your family. All others around will come and start blaming you for not respecting the God and for creating a scene just for few rupees, so much that you start thinking about leaving the place and settle somewhere else. Is it just few rupees? And moreover is it a matter of money? Doesn’t a donation is something which a man does with his own will? If not, why it is even called a donation? Call it a ransom, call it a threat.

It so much threat that women and girls avoid crossing the mandap alone, huge amount of money is collected for a special queue which will take you to the idol faster, higher the money nearer you can reach the god. Donate a gold crown and you will be made to sit in the lap of the God. This is how it works now.

A beautiful event and a respectful festival, is slowly losing its value, its charm and its dignity. But then as it is said no Good can be good forever, slowly, eventually it turns to Evil.
In the end Ganpati bappa morya (oh Ganpati ! My Lord)!! all you already know …  

She !!

She kept weeping, so much that her body has started struggling for each gasp. Each breath was as if hiccups have increased its extent. Lady Constable was constantly trying to comfort her by rubbing her back and offering glass of water.

‘This is too much sir, we must file this complain and take those animals to court’ constable said to inspector who was stationed in front of her, staring at her burned hand and cursing the fate of this poor woman. Society is still not grown up. They still treat women as if they are their own possession. Beating their wife is still a matter of manhood for those who are not able to digest their equality.

‘I thought they would realize, my care for them will change them one day, but today when they tried to burn me alive. I was left with no other choice but to come here with my plea’ she said controlling her tears. ‘I have done all to save my marriage. Today, with no reason at all they all just shot on me, first my husband kicked me and punched me while my father-in-law was shouting from the corner of the room and suddenly my mother-in-law came with a burning stick and kerosene and tried to burn me alive, it was then I ran out of the house and came here.’ She said and again started crying.

One of the constables was busy scribbling the story on a paper. Once he was done he came to the lady. She took the paper and signed it without even reading it.

‘Let’s get them here’ The Inspector signaled other constables and next moment they left for the address given by the lady.

It was quiet in the police station; only evident sound was sobs of the lady. There were few people gathered outside the gate to know more about the case, some of them were media staff as they knew they were going to get something to fill in tomorrow’s newspaper.

They saw the jeep coming back, this time with extra three members. They all were almost dragged inside the station, mother crying loudly, father horrified. They all were pushed in the corner. Inspector stood in front of them observing. He could see burn marks on her mother-in-law, also bleeding forehead of her husband.

‘What do you think, you are?’ shouted the inspector, holding the collar of her husband. ‘Sir, whatever she was saying, is a lie.’ Gulping his own saliva, her husband started,’ Sir, It’s her who want a separate life. It’s her who wants my parents to leave the house. It’s her…’ It all went silent, a huge slap, tearing his skin to bleed was enough to make everything silent. I drop of tear rolled out of his red turned eye.

Inspector turned to the lady constable, gesturing her to take the woman to her home. She stood up and started to the door. All three of them were watching her leave and then from the corner of eye she saw her husband. As soon as their eyes met, she winked…

Another tear rolled out of his eyes. Only good thing which happened today was that he was able to save her mother from the fire.

Breaking News: Ghor Kalyug

‘This is too much for me to handle, what you are doing to that lady is not good, people call her their mother, what has happened to your bloody righteousness? All my life I was standing beside you as a brother, never questioned your integrity but now time has come for me to move out. I will no longer support you in your wrong deeds.’ After speaking his heart out, Vibhishan left the court of Ravana.

All the leaders were tensed and started thinking of a way to get back the support they have lost. ‘What about the other two siblings?’ Digvijaya, one of the prominent rakshas, (Also won Upadhi of Pigvijaya, cause he can kill pigs just by his tongue), questioned. ‘Kumbhkaran is sleeping and need to be awaken to ask for his support and we have no doubt on Surpanakha’s loyalty, she has always been an equal participant, in fact she has a huge hand in abducting the so called mother.

Breaking News: Congress party in continues talk with TMC for its support. Mamta Banergy says, ‘We can’t support a party who is responsible for the suffering of Bharat Mata and beloved Bharatvasi. Samajvadi party is still silent on the current proceedings and Mulayam Singh Yadav plays the game of ‘wait and watch’

‘My lord! We are sure that Vibhishan is no longer going to be a part of our sabha. Other rakshas guys have seen him crossing the sea and singing the same song which our enemies sing, which is something like ‘ram ram japna…’ listening to this, Digvijaya stands up and asks for a permission to speak. ‘who can stop you from speaking Pigvijaya’ someone from the corner end murmurs. Digvijaya ignores. ‘Vibhishan is a small guy, his leaving will not at all affect our army, just we have to make sure that kumbhkaran is still with us and as far as I know he is still sleeping. Give me a chance Maharaj, I will make sure he awakes if not supports’ we could hear someone from the corner saying ‘for that you have to just keep speaking’ which was succeeded by a little laughter. Digvijaya ignores.  

Breaking News: Mulayam singh Yadav says, ‘We will keep opposing FDI and diesel price hike. We will oppose this in Lok Sabha also, we will support the Bharat Bandh’ But just opposite to the statement Samajvadi party has decided to continue their support to the UPA government.

‘Prabhu! I am supporting you just because you are my elder brother. But whatever you are doing to mata is not appropriate. I am just saving your ass by not leaving you and that is it. don’t expect more’ saying this he stood up and walked out of the sabha. People sitting near the door could listen him humming ‘ram ram japna…’

Breaking News: Opposition party calls for Bharat Bandh, huge loss to the economy. Prime Minister Manmohan singh to explain price hikes and FDI policy in Parliament.

Enemy camp is getting ready to attack. They want their mata to be free of Rakshas…you idiot don’t spread such rumors and concentrate on original Goal. Can’t you see everyone is pissed off, they just want this Ravana to go, that’s it, mata is just an virtual symbol and a great opportunity. So just see the eye of the bird, who knows you might end up being next Ravana.

“Then why are we singing the song ‘ram ram japna?’ the other monkey asked. ‘Well because of the next line of it….’ram ram japna…paraya maal apna’ groaned the monkey. ‘Then where is Lord Rama?’ I already told you don’t spread such rumors. Its no Satyug’. Listening to this the other monkey said, ‘Ghor kalyug’

In the court of Ravana, all are eagerly waiting for the Lord to speak and the wait still continues…

Breaking News: Jesus was married…and Digvijaya Singh said we have entered an era of ‘Ghor Kalyug’  we could hear a laugh in the parliyament.         

Indian Penal Code section 124 (sedition)

Affection cannot be manufactured or regulated by law — Mahatma Gandhi

This is what Mahatma has to say about this particular section of the Indian Penal Code.

Aseem Trivedi arrested and sent on a 14 day remand by Mumbai police on the charge of sedition (against the Indian Penal Code’s section 124A. I have given a word to word text of this section at the end of this article).

A cartoonist by profession, made wolfs instead of Lions depicting National Emblem, wrote ‘Bhrastmave Jayte’ in the place of ‘Satyamave Jayte’. I don’t find it sedition. Does it not reflect the current situation of the country? If a Nation like ours cannot digest a humorously harsh comment on a truthful situation, isn’t it a matter of shame?

This article is not against this Law. I completely support it. In fact if I was the supreme ruler of the country this would have been the first law to be passed. After all nobody should speak against his king. Right?

So here it goes, this law was written in late 19th century by the British as a foreign policy. And to be true thereafter it was never changed. We took it as is or I should say blindly from the monarchy. The only change made was the words ‘His Majesty’s Government’ were replaced by ‘Government established’ in the section…irony.

British rulers used it against us to suppress our voices. Mahatma Gandhi himself was charged with sedition under this law and he called it as anti-liberty, anti-justice and anti-truth. And now Government is using it yet again for the very same reason. What difference does the date 15^th August 1947 had made? 

Hope, by this article, I have not commented against the Indian Government. I just thought of using Article19.

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TEXT OF SECTION 124A

Whoever, by words, either spoken or written, or by signs, or by visible representation, or otherwise, brings or attempts to bring into hatred or contempt, or excites or attempts to excite disaffection towards the Government established by law in India, shall be punished with imprisonment for life, to which fine may be added, or with imprisonment which may extend to three years, to which fine may be added, or with fine.

Explanation 1 — The expression “disaffection” includes disloyalty and all feelings of enmity.

Explanation 2 — Comments expressing disapprobation of the measures of the attempting to excite hatred, contempt or disaffection, do not constitute an offence under this section.

Explanation 3 — Comments expressing disapprobation of the administrative or other action of the Government without exciting or attempting to excite hatred, contempt or disaffection, do not constitute an offence under this section.

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Freedom of Speech

When I heard the news of Indian Government regulating the social networking sites like Facebook and twitter, some sovereign citizens of our country, on a popular news channel, were debating about the right to ‘Freedom of speech’. I was not able to restrict myself from writing on the topic.

The Indian Constitution guarantees freedom of speech to every citizen. In India, citizens are free to criticize politics, politicians, bureaucracy and policies, not yet satisfied? just try doing this in China, Iran or Israel. For the matter of fact, Article 19 of the Indian constitution states that:

All citizens shall have the right — 
1.

  to freedom of speech and expression;

I guess we all will agree on this, as long as we are able to call Mr. Manmohan Singh as ‘Robot of a waitress’ and successfully cursing Vilasrao Deshmukh, saying it’s all the deeds and scams, when the poor guy was already on death bed. Misspelling Digvijay Singh as Dogvijay Singh, calling the government impotent, and again opposing saying politicians as government’s illegitimate sons like the one Mr. N.D. Tiwari had. We can say, yes, we have freedom of speech and expression. Point out if you disagree.   

2.        

to assemble peaceably and without arms;

Just spread the word ‘peace’ and viola, you can gather in hundreds or rather in thousands, who cares if you got the permission for it or not, it’s our right, don’t agree? Ask Mr. Raj Thackeray and of course you must be without arms but why is that required when you already have arms, twice than your head count. So what do you think? We have peace, we have arms, bingo.  

3.        

to form associations or unions;

Go ahead and form your own, Indian Mujahidin, ULFA, Jaish-e-Mohemmad, United National Liberation Front, Babbar Khalsa International, Tamilnadu Liberation Army, Students Islamic Moments of India (SIMI), LTTE and many more such unions, I assure, nobody will stop you.

4.      

 to move freely throughout the territory of India;

You can attend any rally and activity in any part of country, whether the flag color is orange or green, nobody will stop you, this is the power of our right to freedom of speech.

5.        

to reside and settle in any part of the territory of India;

Of course you can settle in Maharashtra if your origin is Bihar and of course you can settle in Karnataka if you are from Assam, of course you can settle in Delhi if you are a Kashmiri Brahmin, who stops you? Sheila Dixit? Or a party with colorful flag? Doesn’t matter… 

6.        

to practice any profession, or to carry on any occupation, trade or business.

As long as you are paying tax which goes not into managing country, but in accounts of Swiss Bank, or as long as you do not belong to civil society or the India Against Corruption moment you are free to work, how do you think they would get rich if you don’t work? You are you, a common man and they are they, a common politician.

If you think it’s all done, wait a second, there is no such thing as a free dinner, everything has its cost and limitations, B.R. Ambedkar was a smart guy, he just included few more points saying,

These rights are limited so as not to effect:

The integrity of India - all groups listed above are banned because of this one clause.

The security of the State - applies on all gatherings and if the group is poor, consists of female gender and children then there is huge possibility that you are going to be a victim of some lathis and tear gases from the otherwise helpful Indian police. Sigh if you didn’t get the humor in this.

Friendly relations with foreign States – who Pakistan? Of course we maintain our friendship. You can find their citizen resting in the guest house of Arthur road jail in Mumbai.

Public order – this is for the public who try to effect their own order. So no comments.

Decency or morality – you can ignore this, no one cares about morals now, so forget about this one and ask your women not to step out after 9 and not to go anywhere alone as this part of freedom of speech is null and void.  

Contempt of court – if someone involved in murder, harassment or scam (talking about digits greater than 8, 9, 10) and is set free by the court, dare you protest, you are dishonoring Indian constitution, article 19.

Defamation or incitement to an offense – I will say something about this, once I found the proper definition of offense.

Writing this post, I just used my freedom of speech. You are free to use yours and can comment, after all our constitution gives us the power to express whatever you think. Jai Hind.